in college, i was a religious studies minor. this caused me to enroll in some odd courses such as Religious Existentialism and Philosophy of Religion. one day, in the latter class, our professor posited that the religious world was a different world causing me to exclaim, "does that mean jasmine guy is God?!" now, in my own personal cosmology, the sun and moon revolve around her heavenly blondeness, miss heather locklear.

recently it has been suggested that it is time to invite her aboard to spice things up, shake the rafters, kick things into gear. there is nothing that a little "the walls have ears...and they're mine!" can't fix. unfortunately, her people haven't been returning my calls.