back when i was a wee lad living in california's capital city, sacramento, my best friend and i used to go quite frequently to the one and only dance bar in town, the infamous FACES. on one such weekend evening, after consuming my fair share of cocktails, i found myself getting a serious groove on, out on the back patio. i was truly "lost in music" that night, shaking it down-home style. the next thing i know, one of the most fantastic local drag queens saunters up to me, grabs me by the waistband, tucks a dollar in there and exclaims "bitch, you got it goin' on!". i smiled politely and whirled off back into my dancey trancey.

sometime in late 2000, a gang of folks gathered at the fabulous beauty bar in san francisco's mission district. yes, i know, the damn place, is part of the gentrification problem, but it's a hoot, nonetheless. again, after my fair share of absolut mandarin and tonics, i was stripped down to my tiny t and skin-tight diesels, shaking it for all the world to see. random strangers began tucking bills of various denominations into my waistband. i pulled in over thirty bucks in under an hour.

maybe i missed my calling?